OH MY GOD HOW'D YOU GET SO SKINNY

“YOU’RE SO SKINNY WHY CAN’T I BE LIKE THAT”

“OMG TELL ME YOUR SECRET”

“I’D DO ANYTHING FOR A BODY LIKE THAT”

 

Really? You’d do anything for my body?

You want my body? Take it.

Take it. In all it’s misery.

My body has been starved and slit and beaten.

My body knows more about pain than it does beauty.

 

My body treats food like storm clouds.

And maybe the scars faded, but my body still remembers the tears that fell on top a bloodied wrist.

My body is ashamed.

Ashamed of the worn out bags under my eyes.

Of the bones sticking out of my skin

Of the rashes on my legs

Of the stretch marks on my hips

 

I have not gone one day without hearing those words of jealousy, and every time I have to stop myself from screaming back.

 

What sick society have we grown up in that my 12 year old mind believed that the body everyone wanted-

Had to be worked for,

In the most reckless way possible

For the most drastic results

 

Only to be told that it was for attention-

Is it so wrong to want to feel loved?

 

Only to be told that people had it so much worse-

Thank you for once again reminding me that my feelings are invalid.

 

Don’t ever try to talk to me like you know what the darkness in my mind feels like

Like you know who anyone’s mind is like


Now remember this, remember what I’ve told you, and next time you ask someone for that body you so desperately need, think of the wars their body has fought to still be standing.

Melissa Gargiulo